A Free Access

Today Subarata’s soul came to watch my weightlifting. Her soul left the body at 6:33 p.m. on Wednesday, March 15th, while I was in the plane on my way home from Bulgaria. That is when her soul came to me to say its final farewell. Her physical body passed away at 1:00 p.m. the following day.

Since she left the body, she has been all the time with me, in my house, watching me play my musical instruments. Today, as I was about to lift, her soul came to the doorway and said, “May I come in?”

I told her, “Now you are in the soul’s world. You can go anywhere you want to.”

She was so happy and excited. Usually I say that someone is like a seven-year-old child. But, in her case, she was like a five-year-old child.

She said to me, “I am so happy to be alone with you, Guru. I have never been alone with you before.”

Subarata turns up often in the inner world stories that recount Guru’s light-descending weightlifting career. Only days after her passing, her soul came to Guru in his home while he was seated at the overhead lifting apparatus. There is a wonderful video of this – Guru stops for a while in doing his two-arm lifts, smiles and then softly applauds, clapping his hands together in ovation. Then he begins to sing. Later when we are all viewing this, Guru tells us of this visitation, how her soul was dancing about the weights, and of their conversation. When she applauds Guru’s lifts, he applauds back, telling her how she too, unencumbered by the physical body, can also now accomplish these feats – which to her disbelief and surprise she does.

When I went to use my pulley machine, Subarata’s soul said to me, “You are so strong. You are the strongest man in the world!” I was pulling a certain weight.

I said to her, “You can try it if you like.”
She said, “How can I? I am not in the body.”
I said, “Definitely you can do it. Just try.”

So she tried it and she was able to do it easily. The soul is part of the omnipotent God, so the soul can easily accomplish things that we find so difficult on the physical plane.

Sri Chinmoy
18 March 2000

“She is here, there, everywhere,„ Guru said, gesturing to each side of him and then behind him. Guru said that she has a “free access.„

After her passing, Guru told us that at some time Subarata brought a rose to Guru and placed it at his feet “with such devotion, such devotion.„

After the evening memorial in her honour, Guru said she would leave for the higher worlds. “She is so happy, so happy, so we must be happy with her.

“When you, her sisters and brothers, think of her, think of infinite love, infinite love and gratitude. Now she is in the soul’s world and she is full of infinite love, affection and concern.... If you feel her, immediately feel inspiration. She used to inspire you, and now she can inspire you infinitely more. She is inspiring you. She is with you and for you.

“She is marching forward, so she is beckoning you to fly the fastest. When you think of her, do not feel pain that she is not with you. You will weaken your own determination if you feel her loss.

“She is not dead. She is not dead. She is not dead. She is in you, with you and for you. She is in you, with you and for you. Feel that she is there, she is there, she is there.

“She is one of the luckiest disciples who have passed on. She has an open door. Any time she can come. She has come to her Guru many, many, many times. Subarata will keep a connection with disciples who are very sincerely devoted to me, and also who live a very, very spiritual life. She will definitely work through those who are very sincere and value the importance of purity.

“As a soul she will be able to serve her Guru infinitely more, with boundless wisdom.

“The human plane has lost, but the Divine plane has gained.„

One evening, some weeks after Subarata’s passing, Guru was asked how long he felt it might be before Subarata returned to earth, another chapter in her Godward journey. Guru’s response surprised us all. He indicated that it was at least possible that she might not come back, a departure from the understanding we all had that God-realisation is only won on the earth plane, this special planet where fast progress and evolution are such unique opportunities. Guru’s reply had a “We shall see" open-endedness, a suggestion that the Grace of the Supreme or some special dispensation might come into play and bring about another result.

In my personal and certainly limited experience of Guru’s spoken comments and published writings, I had not encountered this possibility mentioned before, an unrealised human freed from rebirth. But it reminded me that if a disciple can really please a God-realised Master during the disciple’s earth-life, the Master can intervene in all that follows, leapfrog his student up the evolutionary ladder and remove him from the cycle of birth-death-birth, the recurring incarnations otherwise required.

If Subarata does come back to the earth-arena, Guru will not be outwardly here to find her and point her out to us. Finding the needle in the proverbial haystack has a much greater chance of success than encountering a particular soul on a planet of seven billion people—unless that, too, comes to pass through the irresistible Will of God.

Guru commented once that our souls generally do not retain their connections with family members, friends, the countless relationships formed in each life. When it leaves the body, after some time the soul flies away like a bird, unburdened and detached and free. We seem like actors in a play, coming together for a short while on the earth-stage before retiring back to our truer world. And do we remember the many people from our past lives, those we loved, wept over, shared an entire life with? No, we do not. Sometimes, though, this truth may not apply, and there are instances of ongoing connections, karmic entanglements or deep and enduring bonds.

Guru always brought Subarata back to life for us, restoring her among the living, reminding us in talks to the New Zealanders as we stood before the opened doors of the Temple at Aspiration-Ground, or in phone calls, that she has a free access, an open door to come and go, and that really there is no death.

Guru enquired of me once how I was dealing with her absence and I replied that I still missed her, expecting consoling words. With a huge smile Guru said, “I do not miss her – I see her all the time!”

Guru said she would be in the Lap of the Supreme throughout Eternity. He composed a song for her which in translation said: “Subarata, you came into the world to blossom and reveal your God-Victory-message. Therefore your Guru shall preserve your sweetness-heart throughout Eternity.”